Black Christmas
1

  • Glen Morgan
  • 2006

It is Christmas Day and a group of sorority sisters are gearing up for their seasonal celebrations at their house — but so is Billy Lenz (Robert Mann). He used to live at the house with his parents, where he was locked in the attic for years. One day he broke out, murdered his parents and got locked up at an asylum. Now he wants to come home for Christmas…and carry on where he left off. This slasher flick is a remake of a 1974 film of the same name, and the lack of originality in the premise continues with just about everything else.

…as much fun as eating a plate of leftover turkey…

Writer/director/producer Glen Morgan, who had the same role for two parts of the Final Destination trilogy, seems to be blissfully unaware of the mess he gets this film into. The girls being terrorised are barely given any character beyond one having a boyfriend who previously went out with another of the girls, which removes any cares you might have for who dies: they are all so neurotic and self centre you will want all their necks slit. Billy’s story is told partly in several flashbacks, which confuses the present day narrative. The usual horror film logic that a mistreated child will grow up to be a killer is as tired as the predictable deaths. Perhaps the only redeeming factor is it finishes after just 84 minutes — something everyone in the cinema I saw it in were thoroughly relieved about.

Quite how Morgan felt this was a decent release is beyond me. It may have been rushed out in time for Christmas to cash in on the idea, however I wish they had spent more time on it and saved it for next year. In any case, this festive horror offering is about as much fun as eating a plate of leftover turkey everyday for a week…a year after it formed part of your Christmas meal. Rotten.

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